Wednesday, December 3, 2008
Now that my worries are temporarily over, I'm feelin' brutal good. Maurice! is back for the second week of sessions and this time the nice folks from channel 7 news are here to cover him. Gee, I wonder who called? It's a joy to watch Maurice mincing around like a blessed faerie princess muling out his orders to his second assistant Floren. Floren the emu. Floren is a delightful bundle of neurotic tics. The type that talks through clenched teeth and cries while he masturbates. I bet he saves every precious little b.m. Maurice makes in a velvet lined golden box. Maurice! is so used to having his little ass kissed by his retarded entourage that he was more than a little put off by the un-fauning camera crew. They walked around him as if he didn't exist. One of the camermen I talked to, a flying squirrell named Geoff Callahan, said he always gets stuck with these "second string celebs" Geoff seems like the kinda guy that could hook you up with some killer weed if that was your thing. Maurice! is supposedly going to treat us to a dinner at a hibachi grill (a photo op if ever I saw one) and Geoff has been assigned to shoot it. I asked him if he could keep me out of frame and he said he's try and that he could always take me out in the editing room. Oh, and by the way, I HATE Hibachi grills. Todays session with Maurice! is called "What the Experts Don't Want You to Know" Oh good, so he's a conspiracy theory efficionado as well. Jesus.