Hell on the Homefront

Well things seem to be getting back to normal at home this week. My uncle Paul just got through his first episode of musht so he’ll be paying for that for the next few months. He’s got a lot of apologizing to do to a lot of world class grudge holders. I mean, I love my mom and aunts to death, but this is exactly the kind of thing they live for. At any given time someone has to be in the shithouse and this time it was Paul. Musht is a real bad time for us male elephants and I can tell you I’m not looking forward to my first venture into that state. Everyone in musht goes south, behavior-wise, but I have to admit that musht aside, Paul really turned into an unbelievable dick. He was using the foulest language in the loudest voice I have ever heard. No kidding. He made a point to interrupt any conversation going on, find an opposing point, call the males pricks and the ladies the “c” word then stomp off in a fit. It was nasty. Now I’m pretty much the only elephant who will talk to him. No one else will make eye contact with him so he just skulks around sorrowfully looking for anyone to forgive him. They will eventually, but he’s gonna have to wait a real long time. One thing that really pisses me off though is the way Rachel and Brenda are pulling the same silent treatment crap as all the others. Both of them were in oestrus at the height of Paul’s musht and neither of them were bitching about his lousy attitude while he was rutting on them. That’s just so hypocritical but just like them. I think I’ll see if Paul maybe would like to go off with me for a few days just the two of us. It’ll give everyone a chance to cool down a bit.